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Or
even the
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just-so cannoli they brought
home and enjoyed with a
couple of
glasses of a
pricey vintage port.
Larry wasn’t one to
tie a bow
around an SUV
and surprise you
with it in the
drive-
way; and
anyhow, April wasn‘t one to
covet a new vehicle, or
surprises.
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His gifts were
always thoughtful,
personal, and almost certain to
gratify.
This
one’s just a bit of an add-on, Larry said with a grin as April
began gently tugging on the wrapping-paper.
It was her way to extend the suspense of gift-opening for as
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An add-on? She smiled.
You’ve been adding them on
all evening.
You‘re
spoiling me! She pouted theatrically.
Well, at least this isn’t too heavy, she added, giving it a
childish shake as if to
try and guess its contents.
This one might be sortof a gift for me too, he
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A gift for you too, she repeated
teasingly.
Well I might‘ve hoped for a new toaster oven.
But then again,
she continued wryly, I think I might know where
husbands like to go to get gifts for themselves to
give to
their wives, no? She laughed and looked at
him inquisitively.
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His
face answered her with a
devilish, inscrutable grin that gave her a little
flash of excitement.
Silently she thanked herself
for having allowed Larry to drill her for her
sizes as she freed the box of its wrapping and
opened it up in her lap and looked within.
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Erm, she
said blankly.
She looked up at Larry.
He
smiled idiotically.
His cheeks looked flushed.
April
looked down again into the box.
Ah,
where did this come
from? You know, the ah, the Hot
Topic at the mall.
April released a
forced little laugh.
I thought
when most men wanted to
buy a little gift ‘for themselves’, as you might put it, they
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Larry
straightened out
his mouth and took a breath.
Well, that’s
true I suppose, but what I wanted was a little
different.
April curled her
lip in an attempt to
show amusement.
Going
through this effort
helped her decide, somehow, that she was amused.
Yes, she should be amused.
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She held up the glossy pair of
black trousers.
I
take it this isn’t
real leather or something?
Oh god no, it’s PVC.
Your own pair of vinyl pants.
April
suddenly exploded with laughter.
Oh,
goodness! I hope you’re
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You know that’s not my thing.
Larry
produced a look of indignant
denial.
Oh god, no.
I wouldn’t expect you to
wear them out of the house, of course not.
Why ever would I want to
offend your modesty? April laughed, not knowing quite how to
read this.
Erm, I should
think this goes beyond ‘
modesty’ to a question of, oh, taste or discretion or-- she shook her head, --acting like a
grown-up or something.
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Certainly not out of the house.
She
laughed wanly.
Erm, you’re not expecting me to wear them at all, I hope.
Well-- I mean, they’re a present for you.
You wouldn‘t
want to waste a present
completely, would you? April
raised the pants out of the box and held them up above her
head as she sat crouched beneath the
love-seat,
letting the folded pair of patent vinyl trousers
fall full-
length before
her eyes with a crinkle.
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Is the receipt in the
box, dear? No, it’s not in the box.
They’re a real gift.
They‘re meant to be kept.
A real gift,
indeed, she said, continuing to smirk with a show of good-humor.
How
much did these
cost? Oh, never mind that.
Not a lot.
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I might want to see you in them.
Well if you see me in them I’m not
sure how I’d
feel about returning them because these look like the kind of thing that’d
give a girl an infection.
Not that I-- April, you‘re not returning them, dear.
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It’s just a
frivolous little thing and I thought we might enjoy it.
What, you want these to be my
new house pants or something? I kinda doubt that’d be too comfortable.
Why
don’t you try them on? They might be comfortable enough.
And ah, you know, I kinda like the look, which is why I
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She got a little flushed
now, looking at them.
Suddenly she folded them
back into the box.
So this is like, my ‘
sexy’ present? Is this something
that turns you on? Larry smiled crookedly.
Well, a lot of
people find that kind of thing sexy.
--Oh
come on! he stammered,
studying April’s uninviting reaction
without quite
managing to look her in the
eye, you know, it’s kinda--
rock and
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Sexy.
Fun, funky,
whatever.
So wearing these would like, turn me into Britney Spears or
something? Some kind of pop
star hottie? Is that the
fantasy? She felt embarrassed putting it that way, but perhaps a bit
excited too.
These
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vidio. Or am I just
boring you,
dressing my
age and not
being ‘
funky’ enough? You’re forgetting Britney’s
older than you are, he chided.
C’mon.
You know you’re a hot
woman.
You’re definitely a
doll in my
book.
And ah, I’d like to see you in them.
Something you could do for me
every once in a
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Hmm, said April,
more meaningfully than she meant it to sound.
So I might get a little something out of this too, then?
Larry arched a wry brow.
If you mean will you receive intrinsic
enjoyment out of wearing a fine pair of fashion-forward pants, then your answer
should be ‘
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And if you mean would it
make me want to ahm, fuck your
brains out, then my answer,
Birthday Girl, is, definitely.
Yes it would.
They sat in
silence for a few
moments as April processed this.
Really, if Larry didn’t intend the vinyl pants just as some sort of
joke to
get a stupid rise out of her, then
there was no point in trying to twist his
arm to return them. Sexy
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She had laughed, but he obviously wasn’t
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